2016. The year that SO many souls left this world. The year that saw the UK divide and shortly be followed by a division with the USA. The year that so many people want to be over. I have seen so much hate and sadness this for year. So much desire to just move into the next and 'write' this year off. I could have alot of hate for 2016 and a desire to just 'forget it' but I dont and I want to tell you why.
I feel honoured for there to have been so many souls on this earth. So many souls who touched others through their music, comedy, sport and acting. We can't prevent death but we can feel appreciative that this year, we remember the beauiful talent our world has. The beautiful souls who we are sad are gone but blessed to have been touched by their work. The souls whose legacies will be remembered and continute to inspire, truly a year of legends.
The divide within the UK and the USA has shown me how lost we all are. Regardless of anyone's political beliefs, the results this year paint a picture of anger and the despearation for people to search for something better. The results won't change and we can't force people in to a different way of thinking but we can pull together and put our differences aside. We can show the world that having a difference of an opinion is 'okay', it's what you chose to do from there on that matters. Do you chose to fight or work together to create something beautiful?
Positivity doesn't change the past and it might not change the future but I know that in a world full of alot of hate, sadness and regret, sometimes a positive mind is the only control we have. I don't want to be surrounded by a 'cloud' of 2016 when actually there is still SO much to be thankful for.
My baby died but I am happy to have met her and I wouldn't change her existence or swap her for a living baby. Out of something so hard and so destructing, I have been shown a deepness to life and the roots of where love come from. I wish Holly was here but I don't think she was ever suppose to be 'here'. My daughter was meant for other things, she was meant to spread love and share kindness. She was meant to show that life isn't a darkness and life needn't be full of hate. I will ALWAYS wish that she was here BUT she isn't. I will miss her for always, my heart will always be broken and my life always incomplete but I refuse to let the idea of a hated 2016 break me. I refuse to let her legacy die with her.
In 2016, I married my best friend, my soul mate with both of my babies present. In 2016, I met my second daughter and my heart exploded with love. In 2016, I have been surrounded by so much kindness from friends and famiy. In 2016, I watched my first daughter grow in to the most beautiful toddler. In 2016, I remember the famous souls who inspired us and the not so famous souls who inspired us too. In 2016, I chose to believe that it's what we do with a situation not the situation itself that defines us. In 2016, I feel pain but I turn it into kindness.
There is still SO much to be thankful for and so much love to be given.
Holly Dao, in 2016 you chose me to be your mummy. I am SO thankful and I wouldn't change that for the world. Thank you for showing me how to turn darkness into light and thank you for showing me that 2016 needn't be remembered with hate.
How will you remember this year?
On the 7th September 2016 at 25 weeks gestation, Holly was born, still after a battle with complete heart block.